How often do women masturbate? Let’s talk about female masturbation

Female masturbation: How often do women masturbate?

Despite the fact that masturbation is still not talked about enough, there are a number of studies that looked into female masturbation frequency to figure out just how often women masturbate. The findings vary depending on the year of the studies and the countries where researchers surveyed women.

Findings from a 2009 National Survey of Sexual Health Behavior (NSSHB) suggest that female masturbation is fairly common. Researchers surveyed 5,865 people (2,929 of the participants were women) and found that 66% to 85% (depending on age) of women below the age 60 report having masturbated in their lifetime, 60% to 72% reported masturbation during the past year, and 26% to 52% reported masturbation during the past month [1].

A more recent large-scale survey that studied data from 1,958 women and 1,784 men in the United States found that 37% of women reported having masturbated in the last month. Only 9% of women reported having masturbated at least once a week in the past year [2].

How often should women masturbate?

Our sexuality and self-pleasure habits are very individual, and there are no two people alike. Because masturbation is still not talked about enough, it's natural to feel confused about the “normal” masturbation frequency. According to ISSM (International Society for Sexual Medicine), there's no "normal" for how often one may masturbate [3].

Some people may choose to masturbate once a month, twice a week, or once per day. Some may choose to never engage in self-pleasure. No matter where in the frequency spectrum you fall, it's okay. You know what's normal for you and what feels good.

Why does the frequency vary?

Pinpointing the exact reasons why some of us masturbate more often than others is hard because sexuality is so individual. That same recent large-scale survey found that there are many different reasons why people choose not to masturbate, such as it's against their religion, they don't feel comfortable in their bodies, they felt that they were cheating or their partner or their partner didn't like it [2] (just to name a few).

Researchers also found that certain groups of people were more likely to masturbate than others. Being younger, being male, being non-heterosexual, having a higher education, or having a higher annual household income each increased chances of having masturbated more recently and more frequently in the past year [2].

What's interesting is that the researchers in the 2021 study also observed that among women, those who had partnered sex more often also masturbated more often in the prior year [2]. Additionally, women who had a desire for more frequent partnered sex reported a higher frequency of masturbation, which could mean that they simply have a high libido and engage in self-pleasure because the current partnered sex frequency is not satisfying their high libido.

How to know if you’re masturbating too much

While normal masturbation frequency will be different for everyone, there are some universal signs that may indicate that self-pleasure has become an issue.

If you notice that masturbation is taking up most of your time, and in exchange, your work and personal relationships are suffering, it could be a sign that you're overdoing it. If you choose self-pleasure over participating in other activities, such as going for dinner with friends or a partner, it could also be a sign of an issue, and it may be a good idea to seek out a therapist to talk to.

What is the masturbation gap?

The masturbation gap refers to the difference between how often women masturbate compared to how often men masturbate.

It turns out, more men than women masturbate – approximately 60% of men reported having masturbated in the last month (compared to 37% of women) in 2021. Masturbation frequency was also apparent between the sexes – 36% of men reported having masturbated at least once per week in the last year (compared to only 9% of women) [2].

How do women masturbate?

A study that surveyed over 2000 women on their masturbation habits and reasons looked into the most popular ways women typically like to self-pleasure among a list of 11 activities:

• 97% of participants engaged in clitoral stimulation
• 45% engaged in vaginal stimulation
• 45% used audiovisual materials (such as porn) or mirrors
• 39% used sexual fantasies that include their partners

Other activities included things like anal stimulation, masturbation on the back or on the stomach, fantasies that do not include their partners, breast stimulation, and more [4].

What is mutual masturbation?

Mutual masturbation is a sexual sexual activity when you self-pleasure in the presence of your partner. There are no rules here – you can watch your partner masturbate, have them watch you, or both do it at the same time. You may choose to only stimulate yourself or give each other a hand.

A study involving around 300 adults observed that mutual masturbation can be a popular practice in relationships – 49% of men and 54% of women in that study masturbated with their partners. This study found that couples who engage in mutual masturbation sessions on a weekly basis reported higher sexual satisfaction and self-esteem [5].

Is masturbation harmful to your sex life?

Contrary to popular belief, masturbation doesn't cause harm to your sex life. Self-pleasure is not the enemy or a competition to your partnered sex life – it's a healthy and pleasurable addition to your overall erotic repertoire.

Some research shows that women who masturbated during adolescence report less arousal difficulties and higher orgasm frequency during partnered sex compared to those who didn’t. They also tend to take more initiative in sexual activities and have a broader list of sexual activities they engage in [4].

Health benefits of masturbation

Masturbation can be very pleasurable, but that's not all! Not only does it feel good, but it also has numerous health benefits. That includes physical and mental health benefits, such as:

• Better sleep: Research shows that orgasms, whether achieved with a partner or through self-pleasure, before bedtime may improve perceived sleep quality and sleep onset [6].
• Relieves stress: Many studies on female masturbation observe that stress relief is often cited as a motivation to engage in self-pleasure, particularly clitoral stimulation [7, 4, 8].
• Better orgasms: Masturbation helps us to understand our sexuality better and get to know our bodies. Some research shows that women who masturbated during adolescence report less arousal difficulty and higher orgasm frequency during partnered sex compared to women who didn’t masturbate as adolescents [8] – the better we know our bodies and what brings us pleasure, the more enjoyable sex can be.
• Promotes sexual function: A review of different studies found that using vibrators can have a positive impact on men and women who experience sexual dysfunction, such as erectile dysfunction or anorgasmia (when a person has difficulty achieving orgasm) [9].

Tips on how to masturbate

Whether you're just getting started with female masturbation or you already have an established masturbation routine and simply want to find ways to enhance pleasure and infuse some novelty into your routine, we have a number of useful tips:

• Use plenty of lube: Personal lubricant was invented for a reason, and it's something that everyone can benefit from, not only those who have sexual dysfunction. Lube removes friction and enhances all the sensations, which makes masturbation much more pleasurable. So, consider using it during your self-pleasure sessions to make them even more fun. There are plenty of great lubes on the market, but water-based lubes tend to work best because they're safe to use with condoms and sex toys, are easy to clean, and they also won't stain your clothes or bed sheets.
• Address negative thoughts: Masturbation is a natural part of human sexuality – it's nothing to be ashamed of. However, if you find yourself in a negative thought loop when you engage in self-pleasure, don't ignore it. You may want to address those negative thoughts and try to reframe them in a positive light. Try to reframe masturbation as a self-care practice, something you do to appreciate your body, understand your pleasure, and reap the health benefits (which there are plenty of!).  
• Introduce sex toys: Sex toys can be a great way to add extra stimulation and different forms of sensations to your masturbation routine. Consider what form of stimulation (clitoral, anal, G-spot) you enjoy the most and buy a toy designed to enhance it. Adding a vibrator to the mix allows you to explore blended stimulation (ex: G-spot and clitoral stimulation at once or anal and clitoral stimulation) easier, which can bring stronger orgasms for some.
• Invite your partner: Masturbation doesn't have to be a solo adventure – mutual masturbation can be fun and exciting. It's a perfect practice to add to your erotic routine to rediscover what feels good. Consider asking your partner to watch while you pleasure yourself, watch them pleasure themselves in front of you, or engage in self-pleasure together.  
• Switch up the positions: It's normal to fall into a routine when we find something that works well. However, from time to time, you may want to switch up the position in which you masturbate, which allows you to experience sensations in a different way. Even small shifts like elevating your hips with a pillow or propping your legs on the wall can make a difference.

Is masturbation safe?

Masturbation is one of the safest sexual activities we can engage in [10]. If you're masturbating solo, the risks of contracting STIs are extremely low (if non-existent), and so is the risk of pregnancy. Even if you do masturbate with a partner, the risk of STIs and pregnancy is low if you're careful, more on that below.

When masturbating solo using sex toys, consider keeping these things in mind:

• Always wash your sex toys before and after each use to ensure no harmful bacteria are present on the toys
• Use personal lubricant to prevent discomfort and pain
• Avoid using the same-sex toy anally and vaginally in the same session to prevent the bacteria spread, which can disturb the vaginal microflora (use a condom or wash the toy in-between) [11]

When masturbating with a partner, there are also some things you want to consider to make the experience as safe as possible:

• If sharing sex toys, make sure you clean them in between uses, or use different condoms over the sex toy
• If using a sex toy anally and then vaginally in the same session, use different condoms or clean the toy as you switch
• If you're masturbating with a male partner, avoid getting precum or semen on the sex toys or anywhere close to the vulva to avoid unwanted pregnancy

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