Vaginal orgasm: How to have one, what it feel likes, & tips

If you’re curious to learn how to have a vaginal orgasm, you’ve come to the right place! In this article, we’ll discuss the mechanism, what it feels like, and what the difference is between a vaginal and clitoral orgasm.

Are most women capable of orgasm through vaginal stimulation on its own?

In the media, vaginal orgasms are often portrayed as something that happens to everyone. Due to years of misinformation around women’s sexuality, many still believe them to be “better” or more usual than clitoral orgasms. But only 18% of women can achieve a vaginal orgasm without any other type of stimulation. In contrast, around 36.6% of people report that clitoral stimulation is required to climax, and 36% say that while clitoral stimulation is not required, it makes orgasms better [1].

Key aspects of vaginal orgasms

A vaginal orgasm is the type of orgasm that occurs during vaginal penetration, either during intercourse with a partner or using fingers and sex toys. While not everyone may experience vaginal orgasm, stimulating the area can still feel pleasurable for many.

How do vaginal orgasms happen?

The vagina has fewer nerve endings than the clitoris overall, but sensitivity varies across different regions [2]. But it does have one famous pleasure area—the G-spot. The existence of the G-spot is controversial, and over the years, researchers have debated whether it’s real or not. Some more recent research suggests that the G-spot may not be an independent internal pleasure spot but rather a part of the internal clitoral network [3].

The G-spot is an area on the anterior wall of the vagina, located around 2-3 inches or 5-8 centimeters deep [3]. Of course, the exact location of this pleasure spot can vary from person to person as everyone’s anatomy is slightly different.

What does it feel like?

Typically, a vaginal orgasm feels like an intense, pleasurable release of sexual energy that is often felt all over the body. While there are reports of the feeling of euphoria, relief, and relaxation afterwards, orgasms are very individual. Our bodies experience pleasure differently, so the feeling of an orgasm may vary from person to person.

And that’s not all! No orgasm is ever the same for one person, either. The intensity, sensations, and pleasure may be influenced by mood, environment, and other factors, such as hormones.

Clitoral vs vaginal orgasm

Some people report that vaginal orgasms feel deeper, intense, last longer, and offer a whole-body experience compared to clitoral orgasms [4]. However, given everything we know from the recent data on the G-spot being part of the internal clitoral network, technically, vaginal orgasms are likely to actually be clitoral as well. At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter, as long as it feels good for you, both forms of stimulation are great.

Health and psychological factors

One study found that women who were able to achieve vaginal orgasms described them as “more difficult to reach, needing the right position, the right (manual) stimulation, and not being stuck in the mind too much.” But that’s not all! Some women mentioned that aside from longer foreplay and spending longer stimulating the area, they needed to feel close to their partners [5].

Another small study that surveyed 94 women tried to test whether there was a difference in quality between clitoral and penetrative orgasms.. Researchers found that women who regularly had orgasms through penetrative sex scored lower on immature psychological defense mechanisms compared to women who relied on clitoral orgasms [6]. But these findings are not conclusive, and more research is needed.

How to have a vaginal orgasm

Curious to explore vaginal orgasms? Try these tips solo or with a partner:  

• Learn your body first: Before you attempt to have a vaginal orgasm with a partner, it may be a good idea to try exploring it by yourself. Masturbation is a wonderful way to learn your body better and figure out what kinds of touch and stimulation feel best. Once you know your body well, it’ll be much easier to communicate your desires to a partner and have satisfying partnered sex.

• Spend more time getting turned on: If your goal is vaginal orgasm, you may want to spend a lot of time on foreplay beforehand to warm up. Take your time and get turned on. Take a bath beforehand and play sensual music in the background. If you’re with a partner, let them explore your body and all your erogenous zones, like your earlobes, toes, inner thighs, hips, and neck. Try to remain present during foreplay, too, so you truly feel all the sensations and pleasure as it builds.

• Communicate with your partner: Chances are that even if your partner knows you, they still can’t read your mind. You know best what feels good and pleasurable, so let them know! Have a conversation beforehand about what you want to try, what feels good, and what to avoid. During sex, be verbal about what your partner does, too. Making noises helps your partner read you better and is also a huge turn-on for many people.

• Add lube: Personal lubricant can greatly enhance pleasure, even if you already have plenty of natural lubrication! It adds more slip and slide, which makes things feel better. You may want to opt for a simple water-based lubricant as it’s designed to feel natural to the skin and is easy to clean up. It’s not long-lasting, though! So, you may need to reapply as needed.

• Experiment with different sex positions: Each sex position offers various angles that may feel different during penetration [7]. Some may be more comfortable and pleasurable than others, so consider playing around to find the sex positions that work with your and your partner’s anatomy the best.

• Stimulate the clitoris: As we already discussed, many women require clitoral stimulation to climax, and many find sex more pleasurable when they add clitoral stimulation. You or your partner can add blended stimulation during penetration to enhance pleasure [7, 1].

• Use a sex toy: Is finger stimulation not enough during partnered sex? That’s where your favorite sex toy can come in handy! While your partner penetrates you, hold a vibrator to the clitoris for extra stimulation. If you prefer anal stimulation, adding a vibrating (or regular) butt plug while being penetrated can offer a “full” feeling that feels pleasurable for many. If you’re comfortable, try combining all three types of stimulation and see how it feels.

• Don’t put too much pressure: Orgasms can get elusive if you put too much pressure on having one. So, instead of thinking about how to have an orgasm, or whether you’ll experience one or not, focus on the sensations that arise in your body in the moment. Feel the pleasure and be present with it. The orgasm will follow!

What does having no vaginal orgasm mean?

If you’ve tried different tips and tricks and vaginal stimulation alone isn’t enough to climax, that’s totally okay. We’re all different, and our bodies respond differently to touch and stimulation. Vaginal stimulation alone may not be enough for a climax, but that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong. Other forms of stimulation can also be pleasurable, and orgasm is only part of the experience. If sex feels good and enjoyable for everyone involved, it doesn’t always have to end with an orgasm.

If you’re not able to orgasm at all, from any form of stimulation, you’re definitely not alone. Trouble achieving an orgasm is called anorgasmia, and it affects between 10–15% of women and 5–10% of men [8, 9]. Anorgasmia can be either primary, when you’ve never before experienced an orgasm, or secondary, when you used to be able to orgasm, but can’t anymore [10, 11].

There are several reasons for anorgasmia, such as anxiety, stress, depression, trouble in relationships, hormonal changes, taking certain medications, and cultural beliefs [8, 9, 12]. However, it’s important to remember that orgasm isn’t the only way to measure a satisfying experience. In fact, putting too much pressure on reaching it can sometimes make it feel even more out of reach. 

Instead of focusing on climaxing every time during sex, it’s better to focus on what feels good in the moment. But if you find it hard to orgasm no matter what, and it’s causing distress or impacts your daily life, speaking with a healthcare provider or a sex therapist could be a good way to explore what support you may need. 

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